15 ‘Sneaky’ Psychological Tricks To Make People Like You

Jul 12

Who doesn’t like to be liked, am I right? Who doesn't like to be liked, am I right?

There is something about receiving attention and affection from others that makes us feel good on the inside.

Maybe this trait was developed in us as part of our evolutionary process. Regardless, I think we can all agree that it is almost a need to be liked by other people.Since human behavior is so complex and every person has their preferences for everything, it can be quite difficult to immediately make a specific person or group of people like you.

It might seem like rocket science to most, but luckily that is not the case. Psychologists have been studying human behavior for a long time!

And guess what... (*drum roll*)

I've done the hard work for you to take the guess-work out of ‘instant likeability’.

I’ve ripped apart 30+ books on likeability, charisma, and social dynamics to give you just 15 of the BEST hacks to win ANYONE over from your first handshake.

Read below to uncover 15 sneaky psychological tricks to make people INSTANTLY like you.

1) Talk To People About Them

Do you know what most people’s favorite topic of conversation is? It’s them.

Yep, research has shown that talking about yourself is inherently rewarding. It activates the brain's regions associated with motivation and rewards. So, using this knowledge, you should encourage anyone you meet to talk more about them.

Of course, you need to be careful about this.

If you keep asking questions about their lives, they might become suspicious of your intentions. Rather, you should just let the conversation flow naturally and wait for the other person to disclose information about themself. You can then ask for more information about things that you find interesting.

That way, they will likely open up even more and a sense of trust will be developed between you and them.

Pro Tip: If often find yourself running out of things to say, read my popular blog post — Fail-Proof Formula To Charismatic Conversations.

2) Mimic The Other Person

If you ask me, this is kind of weird and sounds very childish. But hey, if the psychologists say that it works, who am I to question them!

This trick is based on a strategy called mirroring. It involves copying the other person’s body language, hand gestures, tone of talking, state of enthusiasm, and facial expressions. (Yeah, it sounds like something we used to do as children to irritate our friends).

Anyway, in this case, the mirroring has to be done subtly so that the other person doesn’t even realize that you are doing it.

Researchers call it the chameleon effect, which makes the other person like you.

Or at least, increases the likelihood of it.

It’s certainly interesting and you should try it out on unsuspecting people the next time you get a chance!

3) Spend More Time With Them

Trust and familiarity play a huge role in any human relationship.

The more people see you or hear from you, the more likely they are to consider you a near and dear one. So, in this trick, you just have to make sure to spend more time with the ones that you want to like you. Make your presence known, either by personally being there, by texting, or by calling.

This is called the mere-exposure effect. I must say, they hit the nail on the head with that naming! Also, researchers have shown that exposure plays an essential role in affinity.

They even found that if someone knows you more than another, they will like you more even if you have had less interaction with them. So, I guess the lesson here is just to show up!

4) Talk Positively About Other People

This one is pretty interesting: Apparently, when you are talking to someone, and you happen to talk about a third person, you should talk about them positively. This is because the person you are talking to will associate the traits you use to describe other people with your personality.

Yeah, it’s true! It even has a name; it’s called spontaneous trait transference.

No one likes a gossip-queen, and apparently, neither does science.

Example: let’s say you are talking to Jane. And you happen to mention one of your friends Adam. Now, if you say that Adam is a generous and kind human being, Jane will associate these qualities with you! She wouldn’t even know that she was doing it.

This has been proven in many studies like this one, showing the interesting ways the human brain functions.

5) Smile And Exude Positive Emotions

Ask yourself this: If two people greet you, and one of them smiles at you while the other just stares blankly, who would you like more?

It’s obvious, right? We humans react more favorably to warmth. And positive emotions and gestures exude this warmth.

No wonder psychologists say that it’s important that when you’re trying to make someone like you, you need to appear happy and cheerful. Half of your job will be done there and then.

Just like we can transmit viruses from one person to another, it seems like emotions too can be transferred. Has it ever happened to you that you met a happy person and started feeling better too? Has it happened that you met a miserable person and started feeling bad too?

Yeah, it’s called emotional contagion. Knowing this, it’s obvious that when you want someone to like you, just smile and be positive in every way possible.

Pro Tip: Does this rule ring a bell? It’s the second rule directly from Dale Carnegie’s famous book How To Win Friends & Influence People.

6) Pay Attention To Your Body Language

It is often said that 55% of any communication happens through body language.

Whether this is true or not is still debated. However, the fact remains; that your body language speaks volumes about you without you even realizing it. It tells the other person whether you are confident, and vibrant, what personality traits you might have, and so on.

Therefore, it’s ESSENTIAL to develop proper body language.

Of course, this might take some time. But once done, you can rest assured that you will instantly come across as likable to other people.

Some hacks that may help here are: using your hands to make gestures, using your head to nod, smiling at the other person, using your whole body to communicate your interest in them, and so on.

7) Share Intimate Information With Them

This is one of the best techniques to get someone to like you. Why? Because people inherently want to feel special.

This is probably why many of us have imagined what it would be like to have superpowers! (Mine was the power to read others’ minds lol). One great way to make others feel special is to tell them secrets about yourself.

When you share this intimate information with them, they feel they are closer to you than anyone else.

This was shown to be the case in a research study. In it, the researchers created pairs of people. One set of pairs was given personal questions about each other to discuss. Another set of pairs was given small-talk type of questions. In the end, the first group of pairs reported feeling more closeness with each other than the second group.

Discover The 7 Steps For Effortless Charisma

Aren’t you tired of hearing, “fake it ‘till you make it” or “just be yourself”? If so, unlock the EXACT proven template to stand out, be noticed, and captivate people — in just 7 easy steps backed by science.

Here’s what to do next: Enter your email below for FREE instant access to my exclusive ebook & discover the 7 Steps For Effortless Charisma:

8) Have A Sense of Humor

You don’t need research to tell you that a good sense of humor goes a long way in making you feel better about a person.

As humans, we LOVE to feel happy emotions. In today’s stress-filled world, this is perhaps truer than ever. But if you need some scientific backing, you can check out this study that found that humor makes a person likable, especially in initial interactions.

So, if you want people to like you, maybe you should first work on your humor. Try to be witty with your comments, and show people that you can have a completely different perspective that is meaningful yet funny. This would work wonders for you.

9) Act Like You Like Them

Sometimes, getting people to like you is as simple as making them feel you like them too. Yes, really!

Psychologists have known about this phenomenon for a long time. Only if you knew about this before, right? Well, now you do. It is called the reciprocity of liking. And it suggests that when you think someone likes you, you tend to like them back too.

This has been shown even in a research study that dates back to 1959. In the study, participants were told beforehand that a specific group of participants liked them. In the end, when they were asked which of the members they liked the most, they chose the ones who supposedly liked them.

So, the next time you’re talking to someone, use your body language, choice of words, and other things to make them feel that you like them. Who knows, they might just reciprocate.

10) Selflessly Help Them Out

Everyone likes good people. There is absolutely no debating this.

When you come across as a selfless person who can rise above your own needs and make a positive change in someone’s life, people definitely pay attention.

You instantly become very likable and people become more likely to want to talk to you and get to know your story.

After all, there are a few examples of others who are like that nowadays. The general worldview of many people is that humans are increasingly becoming increasingly selfish and greedy.

So, when you stand out as a selfless person, it surely makes a huge difference in how you are perceived. So, just be a good person in general, especially to those you want to like you.

11) Remember Little Details About Them

If you have ever been in a romantic relationship, you might remember a moment when your partner remembered a small detail about you. Go back to that moment and think about how it made you feel. It was such a lovely thing, right?

It probably made you appreciate your partner more than ever before! (*gossip voice* “Seriously Sheila, he remembers all the small things!”)

When someone remembers things about you, especially small details you never expected them to remember, it shows that they care.

It shows that they are not superficial like most people out there and are genuinely interested in you. Obviously, this goes a long way in enhancing how you perceive them.

So, when trying to get someone to like you, make sure you listen to them and remember as many little details as possible. Then, mention those at the right time, and voila!

12) Maintain Eye Contact

You might have heard that the eyes are the window to the soul. You might also have heard that your eyes express much more than your words can. Well, I think there is truth to these statements. You can tell a lot about a person just by studying their eyes. Of course, you need some experience to do so.

But my point is, how you use your eyes while talking to someone goes a long way in shaping how that person perceives you.

When you maintain eye contact with someone, you project confidence. And as you might already know, confidence is a highly attractive quality in any person.

Maintaining eye contact also sends a signal that you are open and honest. As such, they naturally feel more comfortable with you and around you. This helps them like you more.

Pro Tip: If you feel uncomfortable looking at people directly in their eyes, practice looking at the top of their nose bridge instead! Seriously, they won’t be able to tell the difference, and at the same time, it removes the pressure off of you from staring into their soul.

13) Try To Look For Shared Values

If you think about it, it only makes sense that people with shared values tend to stick together. Cultures, religions, communities, and even entire countries seem to be based on this fundamental aspect of humans.

When we make friends, we might subconsciously look for shared beliefs, values, visions, and so on. This is true in various research studies over the past century.

Research shows that people, in general, seem to be attracted to other people with similar attitudes. Therefore, when you’re trying to get someone to like you, you may want to find shared values between the two of you.

This might take a bit of work because you can’t just know everything about them in a single conversation. So, it takes time and a genuine interest in who they are.

14) See The Other Person As They Want To Be Seen

Every person has three selves.

One is the real self - who they really are.
Second one is perceived self - who they think they are.
Third one is their ideal self - who they want to become and seen as.

It is the second one that is of importance in our context. Researchers have shown that people want to be seen by others as they see themselves, even if their self-views are negative. This phenomenon is called the self-verification theory.

Most likely, when you see someone as they want to be seen, they feel as though you understand them. This immediately creates a rapport between the two of you and a natural sense of attraction.

Obviously, we like those people more who we think “get us.” So, you should spend time understanding the self-views of other people and just confirm to those views!

15) Talk About Your Flaws From Time To Time

You may think that you need to be perfect all the time for others to like you. After all, that’s what society teaches us growing up, right?

But this is not exactly true.

Research has shown that people will like you more when you make mistakes. It is called the pratfall effect and explains that imperfection can also lead to attraction.

However, there is a catch. For this effect to work, the other person has to know that you are otherwise a competent person.

So, before you go on telling people about your flaws or making mistakes in front of them, make sure you first establish a competent personality in their eyes.

To Wrap It Up

We all want to be liked by other people.

It is almost like an inherent need owing to our social nature.

Though you might think that it’s hard getting others to like you, or that you are not in control of whether someone will like you or not — the fact is that you can do certain things to tilt things in your favor.

Psychologists have studied human behavior for ages and you just read several proven ways you can make people instantly like you. Pick just 2-3 of these tricks to apply in your daily life and enjoy more attention and affection than ever!

Follow me on LinkedIn and Instagram to stay up-to-date with other life-hacks that I only share on those platforms.

While you’re at it, check out my Amazon bestseller Spark Your Inner Genius!